For Her

This post is for one person in particular, and if you don't like it or don't want to read mushy stuff...



FUCK OFF







Still here?


okay...


To you:

I came home to my place and i found it dark.... and silent.....
a fitting return, the dreaded homecoming i was wishing to avoid....
i open the door and was welcomed by a silent darkness, no malevolent presence, merely... an absence of presence, and that was worse in my opinion.
All of a sudden there's no warmth to the place right now, it's like you took all that heat that you make, packed it into your bags and took it with you, but more likely it's the fact that you were here that made this place warm at all in any sense of the word.

The bus took me along the river, over near Oksu station where we were walking hand in hand not even 24 hours ago and yet driving past i see couples doing the same.... couples that were us just last night... and should be us in the coming months...... but won't be...

I am just glad to have had so long with you .... having you to welcome me home, send me to sleep, do my washing, drag me around to go see things, wait for me to do my stuff.... and to have you to wake up to every morning. But now instead of you, i sit here writing this with a soft toy in my lap....

I see you everywhere I look, thinking of places we've been, i drank the rest of the soup thinking of how i made extra effort in making it just for you, thinking how i wish you were drinking it with me. I'm considering going down to GFC and all i can think abotu is how we never got to go there one more time before you left. I don't think i'll stop thinking about how i wish you were here and even as i write this i know that you're in a plane flying to HK..... away from here ... away from me....

it's so cold here now.... so empty..... so..... isolated......

I wish i was on the plane with you to return home with you, and not missing the symbolism that it is you who brings me home....

my eyes are stinging right now.....

and all i want to say....

is that.....


i miss you.




and now it's my turn to post this:









You're in my arms
And all the world is calm
The music playing on for only two
So close together
And when I'm with you
So close to feeling alive

A life goes by
Romantic dreams must die
So I bid mine goodbye and never knew
So close was waiting, waiting here with you
And now forever I know
All that I wanted to hold you
So close

So close to reaching that famous happy end
Almost believing this was not pretend
Now you're beside me and look how far we've come
So far we are so close

How could I face the faceless days
If I should lose you now?
We're so close
To reaching that famous happy end
Almost believing this was not pretend
Let's go on dreaming for we know we are
So close
So close
And still so far